I’m above lining up like cattle just to shop

I’m going to be bluntl: I’m above standing outside in the rain to go into a store.

Call me arrogant or snobby, but I have no desire to line up like cattle just to spend a few minutes in a shop no matter how much I need or want something.

There is little appeal in waiting my turn and being waved in by a guard as though I’m walking through security at the airport. I’ll do it there and that’s where I draw the line. The shopping experience should be enjoyable but in light of the coronavirus restrictions, I find myself longing to be in the never-ending airport line so I could at least escape to somewhere else.

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Last weekend, I ventured out for a brief shopping experience now that retail establishments are opening. After the hour that I tolerated it, I vowed I wouldn’t do it again any time soon. (In fact, if you see me out and about, confront me. I welcome it.)

I arrived at a strip mall where people were lined up nearly around the block just to go into a dollar store when it first opened. Wondering if it were Black Friday or Boxing Day, I questioned why people would waste their time to go in there.

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Ditto at a hardware store where I planned to get something for my house but realized it was similar to waiting to go on rides at Disney World. I was expecting a countdown clock to give a time estimate for how long of a wait I’d endure.

There are scenarios where I could justify or see it necessary that people practically camp out for the chance to go in the business. Those who must do their banking or need something urgently where it’s a matter of life and death, sure.

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Quite honestly, nothing about the new process appeals to me. I don’t want to be told when I can walk through a door, I don’t want to be told to sanitize my hands when I enter, I don’t want to be told the direction I must walk down an aisle, I don’t want to be told where to stand.

I thought I would be alone in this feeling, but I’ve connected with some of my radio listeners in recent days and found that I’m not. These are people in various places across Canada and the U.S. and most of them said they’ll only venture out if it’s absolutely necessary — even then, it’ll be done as quickly as possible.

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I realize these measures are in place for the health and safety of patrons but if we’re still tip-toeing around and being overly cautious, then maybe we’re not ready to attempt to get back to “normal” life — ’cause as far as I’m concerned, there’s nothing normal about doing this stuff.